Monday, 24 February 2014

Loving me.

I have spent the last 12 months learning a lot about me. Doing courses that peel off layers and help me see where I am and where I would like to be. I have started a journey to loving myself and accepting that I am me, and I am great.

There seems to be a 'spiritual' awakening happening around the globe. Spiritual in the sense of the spirit of self.

Image source: Pinterest

The only problem I am finding with all of it is a lot of the people embarking on this journey around me are not parents. Or if they are parents, they have young children. I find some things hard to relate to.

I have nothing (at ALL) against this. I just find that there are times when I think - how am I supposed to fit this into my life as well?

I have four children.

To be completely honest with you, I started this journey for my children. For my daughters because I want them to value themselves as much as I value them. And as Brene Brown says 'You can only love someone as much as you love yourself.' I needed to re-evaluate how much I loved ME.

Image source: Pinterest

There are a lot of courses, e-courses or face to face, out there to choose from. There are life coaches and there are ebooks. They are all fantastic. They all require some level of commitment.

I have four children.

I work. I have my hobbies. Where am I supposed to fit in yoga? Meditation? Me time?

What do you mean stop drinking wine at night? How will I get through the dinner, bath and bed routine? More water? I don't have time and I need the caffeine.

But I did it. Some days I don't get time for yoga, some days I don't meditate. But I notice when I don't. More importantly, my kids notice when I don't.

The other day on the way to school we realised Big Mudpie had forgotten his library bag. We were already late. I was almost late for work as well. I started yelling. I turned the car around. We went home.

While I was running into the house I realised something. He is only a kid. He didn't mean to make us late. Yes he needs to listen more. I am not taking responsibility for him forgetting his library bag, but I am taking responsibility for how I reacted to it.

I got back in the car and calmly said - "Next time you are on your own. You forget this after my reminder and you miss out for the week". He hasn't forgotten it again (so far).

That afternoon Big Butterfly asked me if I had meditated that morning - I replied that no, I had been too late in getting out of bed. She commented "I thought so, you never yell when you are meditating". It was offhand and she didn't mean it as a criticism, just something she had noticed.


Image source: Pinterest
I took notice too.

I have stopped drinking alcohol at all during the week. I rarely drink it on weekends. Is there more yelling through the night time routine? Actually, no. Surprisingly, no.

I am not telling you this to be self righteous. At all. Although make no mistake, I am proud of how far I have come. I am just trying to work out which bits of this self-realisation and self-love work for parents, mothers especially.

I am certain that any mum who takes the challenge to love themselves more will be thankful for it within 6 months of beginning the journey.

I am so certain of this that I am thinking of starting my own business to make this more accessible to mums. Young and old. New and experienced.

We as women, and especially as mums, need to stand together and say that it is ok to love ourselves. Not just pay lip service to that, but to really deeply truly love ourselves. It isn't easy and it takes time. It hurts sometimes and it can be huge, but when we get to the point when we can cut ourselves some slack and we can accept who we are as the best we can be, it feels incredible.

Image Source: Me

Because I am enough. You are enough. We are all enough.


2 comments:

  1. I'm glad your back blogging. I had missed your posts.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Just loved reading this post - resonated with me so much. Thank you.

    ReplyDelete